Dissection

I decided to do a bit of dissecting today. What on you ask? The Shopping Centre of course.  Yep it's all hard hitting action around here.
There are many different kinds of inhabitants that frequent The Shopping Centre.  Not all of them are rant worthy, most of them are.
 

The Teenager: This is one of the inhabitants that get on my last nerve frequently.  Sure there are nice ones around....those ones don't hang around shopping centres acting like wankers.  You know the ones, they are loud, obnoxious and always in large groups.  The local Shopping Centre tried to stamp down on these creatures by saying people under the age of 18 couldn't be in groups of more than 4. Yeh it worked for a whole week I think.
 

The Senior Citizen: This inhabitant tends to save all of their shopping adventures to one day. The dreaded Pension Day.  The general consensus is that this day is a Thursday.  Around here it seems to lean more towards a Friday.  The Senior Citizen has two very distinct categories. There is the cute little old lady/man. They fill you with all good stuff and remind you of the Disney industry generated Grandparent figure. Then there is the complete polar opposite.  The nasty, rude little old lady/man.  I understand that we should respect our elders BUT respect should be something that is returned.  You being over the age of 60 doesn't give you the right to push in front of me and my son at the checkout. If you have less things than me, I might have let you go first anyway.  You being rude about it just leaves a sour taste in my mouth.
 

The Bogan Family: This group of inhabitants don't have shoes, clothes are usually ripped and dirty, just like their foul mouth.  Don't get me wrong I drop the F-Bomb like the best of them, but there is a time and a place.  Walking through your local Shopping Centre is not that place.  Also please try to keep your kids in some kind of control.  We all know that Shopping Centres are like drugs for small kids but if you're too busy snogging your latest Baby Daddy, then that shit is not cool.
The 'Whoops is this a Shopping Centre, not a nightclub': There is a whole post dedicated to this right over here
 

The Large Group: When I say large group, I am talking more that 5.  A large group on its own is not annoying.  It's when said large group insists on walking in a straight line across the walkway.  You know, blocking the whole fucking thing! Have you ever tried to navigate a pram or trolley through one of these groups? It's damn impossible.  None of them move, none of them acknowledge that there are OTHER FUCKING PEOPLE WHO ARE TRYING TO SHOP TOO!
 

The Dreamer: Although the name may lead you to think that this person is all arty and swish. No. This person is too busy in their own world to realise that there is actually other people in the Shopping Centre.  You know, people who are trying to get shit done.  They wander around, saying hello to the 500 people they know, usually done in a door way of a store.  Don't even try saying 'excuse me'. It will fall of deaf ears and you'll be forced to look like you are a member of 'The Bogan Family' by cursing them out.
 

The Get In, Get Your Shit and Get Out: This is me. I don't like shopping for the sake of shopping anymore.  All of the above inhabitants have ruined that for me. 

Which inhabitant are you? Are you a little bit of different ones?
 

Linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT